WHO WE ARE: SABASTIAN BERRY
Sons
“We need more platforms for black men to openly talk and express what the world is like through our eyes. Our perspective is missing in so many spaces, and it shows....”
Q: What does being a son mean to you in 2020?
A: In 2020, almost more than any other time in recent history the target on the back of black people, particularly black men has grown. The rhetoric coming from the White House and President Trump has only emboldened racist individuals who were otherwise relatively silent in recent years.
Being a son in 2020 comes with a certain level of fear and pressure that has always been placed on black men but is now coupled with the harsh rhetoric and policies mentioned in the previous paragraph. As a son, I want to make my parents and family proud. In doing so comes a lot of pressure.
I personally did not fully understand that education, money, and sometimes even connections are not enough to overcome the systemic racism that exists within American corporate culture. So, to be a son in 2020 means trying to achieve all of the goals you’ve set out for yourself as well as the goals your family has put on you to achieve, while trying to navigate a world that is not designed for your success.
Q: How have the injustices against the black community impacted your view of
family?
A: My view of family has changed so much over the past few years. Being able to see and physically touch my family members has so much more meaning than it used to. Growing up in the south, I was well aware of the injustices (health, economic, educational, etc.) that affected the black community. However, my experiences with those injustices had always been somewhat sheltered thanks to my parents trying to make sure that we did not have some of the same experiences they had growing up.
As we’ve seen the list of names of black people who have been killed at the hands of police brutality grow exponentially over the past decade, I understand why my parents constantly called to check on me on my drives from Tallahassee to South Carolina. They understood what I did not at the time; that in America, even in the 21st century, I was still viewed as a threat.
Regardless of the fact that I was a well-spoken college student, they knew police officers in the rural south targeted black men at higher rates and therefore to my family my life was always in danger. As I look at my younger cousins who are now in college I try to echo the sentiments of “arrive home alive.” Though they don’t fully understand those sentiments now, I know that with time, and the loss of innocence that occurs as one grows up they soon will.
Q: How do you feel being a black man in the world today?
A: Cautiously optimistic. I have seen humanity in the world. Opportunities to love, to forgive, to grow, and improve. However, I move in the world with an abundance of caution, much like my father and grandfather, and the other black men have had to do for centuries. America, and arguably most of the world, has been cruel to black people. However, that doesn’t mean that there aren’t good people who are truly trying to make a difference and make the world more equitable for all. Black men are not a monolith, and my hope is that one day the world will be able to fully recognize that and appreciate it.
Q: What would you say to other young black sons?
A: Firstly, life isn’t all bad. Yes, it can get tough. Yes, you will get discouraged, and yes at times you’ll even wonder if your hard work will ever be noticed/is it in vain. Keep grinding, create ways to be self sufficient if you can, and remember to never give up. You will get noticed, you will succeed, and things will better with time.
Secondly, go to therapy. I think far too many black people, specifically black men don’t put enough of an emphasis on mental health. With so much negative energy being thrown your way, you’re going to need a healthy way to decompress and talk things out. I suggest getting therapy before marrying and having kids. That way you don’t carry your traumas into your marriage or pass them on to your children.
Give back. The worst someone can do is become successful and not give back to the community/places that fed into them. Be a giver of your time, talents, resources, etc. even if it’s a small amount. Your life, and the lives of others will be much better and far happier because of it.